Pros And Cons Of Banning Asbestos [Video]

The Environmental Protection Agency has for the first time banned all uses of asbestos, which is linked to various forms of cancer but is still employed in some industrial processes. The Onion explores the pros and cons of banning the controversial material.

Leases can be one page shorter.

A lot of people worked really hard installing it.

Still plenty of other good ways to get cancer.

Extremely un-American of government to improve public health.

Puts the fear of God into polyurethane foam.

Gives those whiny mesothelioma people a win.

Opens door for new, younger chemical to kill people.

Feels woke somehow.

Death will just have to find you some other way.

People might ask why we didn’t ban asbestos sooner.